I have a bit of a controlling nature.
There, I said it. 😄
And apparently it extends to books.
I usually have an idea of what my son should read, what would be good for him, what level he should be reading, what we should read together…you get the idea.
Lately, though, I’m trying to get better at giving him some space to choose for himself.
Because obviously, if I want him to actually enjoy reading, maybe he should occasionally get to decide what he wants to read.
Revolutionary, I know.
That’s how Charlotte’s Web came into the picture.
He was interested in the movie and wanted to watch it. I told him we absolutely could, but asked if he’d be willing to give the book a chance first.
Then we’d watch the movie.
He agreed.
Why I Wanted the Book First
This part wasn’t really about making him read before he was allowed screen time.
I just love what happens in your head when you read a book before you’ve seen the movie.
Before we watched Charlotte’s Web, nobody had shown him what Wilbur was supposed to look like.
He could decide.
What does the barn look like? How big is Charlotte? What does her voice sound like? What does the fair look and smell like?
The author gives you the story, but leaves all this empty space for your imagination to fill in.
That’s one of my favorite things about reading.
When I read, my mind is completely free to build that world however it wants. And two people can read exactly the same words and somehow see completely different places in their heads.
Movies are wonderful too! We love movie nights.
But once someone shows you their version, it’s hard to unsee it.
So I wanted him to have his own Charlotte’s Web first.
And maybe this is still my controlling nature showing up in a slightly nicer outfit. 😂
But I’m glad we did it that way.
Then We Just Read
I didn’t have activities planned.
I didn’t prepare discussion questions.
And I tried very hard not to turn it into homework.
We just read.
And somewhere along the way, we started talking.
There was actually much more in this little story about a pig and a spider than I remembered.
A Pig and a Spider Somehow Have a Lot to Teach Us
The friendship between Wilbur and Charlotte is obviously at the center of the story, but what I noticed more as an adult was how Charlotte helps him.
She can’t physically rescue Wilbur.
She uses what she’s good at.
Words.
And that gave us something interesting to think about:
What are you good at that you could use to help someone else?
I like that question because there’s no one right answer.
You don’t have to be the strongest, smartest or bravest person in the room to be useful to somebody.
Sometimes you just have something you’re good at.
What Would Charlotte Write About You?
Then there are Charlotte’s famous words:
SOME PIG.
TERRIFIC.
RADIANT.
HUMBLE.
This is probably the easiest little activity to take from the book.
Ask:
If Charlotte made a web for you, what word would she write?
Then turn it around:
What word would you put in a web for someone else?
You can draw a spiderweb and put the word in the middle if your kid is into it.
Or don’t.
Sometimes a conversation can just be a conversation.
And knowing kids, there’s also a reasonable chance Charlotte’s carefully chosen character word will be something like FART MASTER.
That’s okay too. 😄
And Then the Story Gets Sad
I remembered what happened to Charlotte.
But reading it as an adult, next to your child, is different.
The book doesn’t make a huge production out of death. It’s sad because it is sad.
Wilbur loses his friend. He misses her. And life keeps moving.
Her babies come. Some leave. Some stay.
Wilbur never forgets Charlotte.
I think books can make conversations about difficult things easier because you don’t have to start by talking about us.
You can start with Wilbur.
How do you think he feels?
And sometimes that’s enough.
I Still Have to Stop Myself From Turning Reading Into School
This is probably connected to that controlling-parent confession from the beginning. 😄
It’s very tempting to constantly check whether your child understood what you’re reading.
Why do you think he did that?
What do you think happens next?
What was the main idea?
At some point you’re no longer reading Charlotte’s Web. You’re conducting an assessment.
I’m trying to do less of that.
If he wants to talk, we talk.
If something is funny, we laugh.
If something deserves a question, I ask one.
And sometimes we just keep reading.
Because I can work on comprehension with him separately.
I don’t want to accidentally take all the fun out of the very thing I’m trying to get him to love.
Finally, the Movie
And yes, I kept my end of the deal.
We watched the movie.
That actually created another fun conversation because now we could compare what we’d imagined with what was on the screen.
Is that what you thought Wilbur looked like?
Did you picture the barn like that?
Is that how Charlotte sounded in your head?
Sometimes the movie matched. Sometimes it didn’t.
And that’s exactly what I wanted him to experience.
For a little while, there had been no official version.
There was just the story and whatever his brain decided to do with it.
I started this whole thing by trying to give him a little more control over what he reads.
He chose Charlotte’s Web because he wanted to see a movie.
Not exactly the beautiful literary motivation I might have chosen for him. 😄
But he chose it.
We read it. We talked. Then we watched the movie.
And I’m starting to think giving him more space to lead me toward the books he wants to explore might be one of the better things I can do for his reading.
Even if I still reserve the right to occasionally say:
“Book first.” 😄
If You Want to Read (or Watch) Along With Us
If Charlotte’s Web sounds like something your kid might enjoy, here are the versions we’re talking about:
📖 [Charlotte’s Web (2006) – Book on Amazon]
🎬 [Charlotte’s Web – Movie on Amazon]
And if you’re doing book-before-movie like we did, I highly recommend resisting the urge to show them pictures from the movie first. Let them build their own Wilbur, Charlotte and barn for a little while. 😊
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